Chapter 208 - Free Yourself From The Past (2)
With their families\' help, Shen Zichen and Li Chuntao\'s move to Li Yuren\'s private villa was done without a hitch. Since the villa was fully furnished, there weren\'t many things that the couple needed to add to the place.
Shen Zichen had decided to resign from his post at the hospital to focus on his wife\'s pregnancy. Li Chuntao\'s fear of giving birth to a stillbirth baby still gave her nightmares at night, keeping him awake sometimes. She was afraid that their new baby would end up like Li Zirui.
Their days were spent gardening and trying out new recipes Shen Zichen got from his mother, while Li Chuntao started to busy herself by reviewing the medical books her husband had in his collection.
As the weeks progressed, her baby bump started to show and Shen Zichen couldn\'t be happier seeing her grow with his child in her womb. He\'d missed his chance to be there beside her when she was carrying Li Zirui and he didn\'t want to miss his chance this time.
Now, in the fourth month of her pregnancy, Li Chuntao\'s baby bump was obvious. She had gained a few pounds, but her doctor assured her that she was doing just fine and she need not worry about her baby.
One morning, Shen Zichen woke up in bed without Li Chuntao beside him. He groggily forced himself out of the bed to seek his pregnant wife around the villa. The sun was barely up in the sky, but Li Chuntao had already started her day without waking him up.
He found Li Chuntao in the kitchen, browsing on her laptop for a cake recipe, which confused Shen Zichen. Was she craving for sweets early this morning?
"Morning." He placed a kiss on her crown and took a seat next to her. "You\'re up early today. Why are you looking for a cake recipe? Are you craving for one?" He asked.
Li Chuntao stopped what she was doing, the smile on her face instantly vanished.
"No, it\'s not for me, Zichen." She said in a low voice. Shen Zichen would\'ve missed it if he wasn\'t sitting next to her.
"Then who?" He couldn\'t think of anyone who was celebrating their birthday today. Was he forgetting someone?
"Zirui," Li Chuntao said as if it hurt her to utter her child\'s name. She had never mentioned this tradition she used to do every year.
Shen Zichen stilled for a moment and looked at his wife, who was looking dejected right then. The sadness reflected in her eyes as she mentioned Li Zurui\'s name made him realize how oblivious he was.
No wonder she woke up early today. He had no idea that ever since Li Zirui\'s death, Chuntao had bought a birthday cake for her dead baby and celebrated his birthday every year. She would sing Li Zirui a birthday song before she collapsed in an emotional breakdown.
Years had passed, and her love and grief for her baby still remained. The more Shen Zichen thought about it, the more he regretted not being by her side during those hard times.
"Then let me help you bake a special cake for Zirui." He told his wife. "You won\'t be doing this alone from anymore, love."
Shen Zichen made a resolve. He wouldn\'t allow Chuntao to face her pain alone anymore. As her husband, he was willing to stay with her through thick and thin.
They started their day by preparing their breakfast together before deciding what kind of cake they should bake. Li Chuntao knew how to cook, but she wasn\'t a capable baker like her husband, who had practically been raised in the kitchen by his mother along with Shen Yuyan.
Li Chuntao had no preference on what flavor it should be, as long as it would be suitable for a young boy at seven years of age. Her baby would have been seven by now if he had lived, but fate had another plan for him.
A few hours later, they had finished baking the cake for their first child, lit a candle, and sang happy birthday for Zirui.
Shen Zichen was worried that Li Chuntao would cry again. Not that he could blame her. In fact, he couldn\'t even stop the tears that rimmed on his eyes when he thought about how Li Chuntao lost their first baby. He couldn\'t imagine the trauma and pain she had to face alone because of him.
"Chuntao?" He called her out after he was done cleaning the kitchen and found her standing at the porch of the villa, deep in her thoughts.
These days, he always found her like this. As if she was physically here with him, yet her thoughts were always somewhere else. He hoped that the day would come that she would be truly happy with her life with him.
Was she still thinking about Ying? Was she still thinking about Mu Jianyu and Lin Meirong?
Maybe it was selfish on his part to ask her to give up on her revenge plan and focus on the life she had with him. It was probably hard for her to let go of all the pain and hatred she nurtured inside her heart.
Shen Zichen knew that he couldn\'t help her with it and could only stay by her side. Li Chuntao needed to make peace with herself and let go of the pain of losing Ying so she could continue living peacefully, but a part of her wanted to see Lin Meirong and Mu Jianyu suffer for hurting her sister.
Li Chuntao knew she had to find a way to let go. She would definitely release her heart from the shackles of pain and grief.
Shen Zichen wrapped his arms around her and placed a hand on her stomach, feeling their unborn baby move under his touch. A small smile crossed his lips.. His whole world was in his arms and he would protect them at all cost.