Novel Bin Chapter 206 - Letting You Go (2)
As Lin Meirong\'s body was washed over with another wave of pain, she once again regretted not aborting the baby as soon as she found out she was pregnant. Had she stopped her pregnancy, the cancer cells within her body wouldn\'t metastasize at an alarming rate. Yet, she was also aware that it was too late for regrets because she couldn\'t change anything in the past, no matter how horrible she felt about it.
Being diagnosed with cancer, Lin Merong felt that her head was spinning and felt like life was sucked out of her. It threw her whole universe into a free fall which she couldn\'t even escape.
Since she found out that she had cancer, the money she had accumulated from her past lovers and career over the years started to dwindle. She was subjected to several medical treatments, which included expensive chemotherapy. Lin Meirong wasn\'t even sure how far these treatments could keep her alive.
She also had to submit to a sudden change in her lifestyle. The only thing that she could control was what to eat, what to drink, and how to move. Someone had told her to get a support system for her own good, but Lin Meirong only laughed at that.
Who would bother to look after her? Who would want to stay by her side when she had already lost everything. No… she corrected herself. She didn\'t lose them, she discarded them, completely out of her life.
The husband and son she\'d abandoned years ago, and the daughter she gave away to her last lover. This was just the start of her long suffering. She wasn\'t ready to die yet, but the pain she was subjected to each day was enough to reduce her will to live as the days passed by.
She didn\'t want to look at her scans again. She knew that cancer was taking over her body and her whole being was aching. Exhaustion caught up with her and the chemo was going to break her, but she had no other choice, right?
"Ms. Lin? It\'s almost time."
She snapped out of her deep thought when a nurse came to her hospital room to remind her of the operation she had to undergo. She nodded her head and let the other nurses wheel her to the operating room.
Tears rimmed her eyes, uncertain of how long she could keep herself alive. Should she just commit suicide to stop all of her pain and suffering, or continue to get treatments, fighting her sickness with a low survival rate? Either way, she would end up being dead anyway.
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The operation was successful and finally over. The doctor had managed to cut most of the tissues infected with cancer away and believed that the rest would disappear through chemotherapy.
However, Lin Meirong had lost one of her kidneys, her uterus, and half of her liver. She would need to find a compatible donor soon. They took her to the ICU for recovery, but the doctors were nervous that the lack of compatible organ donors would be the one to kill her and not cancer itself.
Her fragile body was stuck on the hospital bed. She was on a ventilator but not one soul was around to look after her. Was she going to die alone?
It was weird to see her like this, since she was once a popular actress before the scandal ruined her. People used to flock around her. Yet, right now, Lin Meirong had to endure everything alone.
Days later, Lin Meirong opened her eyes and she heard familiar voices within the room. She groaned in pain and tried to focus where she was, but the moment she opened her eyes, she recognized her estranged husband in the room, with a boy in his arms and Meng Lan standing next to him.
What were they doing here? And how did they find out she was here?
Lin Meirong blinked and took a deep breath. Now that she could breathe on her own, the ventilators had been removed from her. Still, she could feel some kind of itchiness and dryness in her mouth and throat.
"W-what… what are you doing here?"
Her gaze shifted back to the young boy in her husband\'s arms… Lin Meirong was sure that this was the son she abandoned years ago. The boy had grown up well, and judging by their appearance, it seemed that the family she abandoned had been thriving well without her.
Guilt and shame filled her, forcing her to look away. Did she really have to face them under these circumstances?
"Someone told us you are here. What\'s going on, Changge?" Meng Huan frowned.
Lin Meirong snickered at that and shook her head.
"Isn\'t it obvious that I\'m dying? What brings you here anyway? I never thought that you would seek after me."
"I used to." Meng Huan admitted, "I looked everywhere for you when you ran away. I didn\'t understand why you left at first, but now it\'s perfectly clear to me how selfish the woman I was married to."
"You\'ve seen me. Isn\'t this enough?" Lin Meirong hissed in pain. She wasn\'t ready to face such humiliation. In fact, she never thought she would see them before she passed away.
If she\'d stayed with Meng Huan in that pitiful, remote village, what kind of life would she have right now? Would she lead a peaceful but boring life with them or would she still be killed by this illness?
Lin Meirong laughed at herself inwardly. There was no point wondering about \'what if\'s at this moment. There was nothing else she could do or change to make her life better.
"No." She saw Meng Huan\'s jaw hardened as if he was struggling to keep his emotions at bay. "I came to ask for divorce, but I\'m not that cruel like you, Changge.." His tone was one of pain and anger, yet he wouldn\'t lash to his own wife. "Seeing you like this… Changge, where did we go wrong?"