Unpredictable Marriage.

"That\'s right Mei, why did you leave the delivery room mid-way, were you sad that something would go wrong?." Liu Huiling asked.

"It\'s not just about that." Liu Dongmei replied as she sighed to herself.

"Then what\'s the problem, what happened?." Liu Huiling asked curiously.

  Liu Dongmei sighed again. "Well, I couldn\'t watch Lihua go through that pain, I couldn\'t take it. I felt like I was the one passing through the pain instead of her, so I just had to run off somewhere to feel better."

"Why are you talking as if you have never given birth to a child before?." Liu Huiling asked.

"Sister, you might not know this, but I\'m actually afraid of the pain that comes with childbirth, and that\'s the reason I have only a child." Liu Dongmei revealed.

"What?!." Liu Huiling exclaimed with an unbelievable and shocking expression on her face.

"Yes.". Liu Dongmei confirmed her doubts.

"Like seriously, you\'re telling me you only have one child because you don\'t want to have any more children because of the pain that comes with childbirth?."

"Yeah. I don\'t want to go through that process again. You know, I almost lost my life back then. I had bleeding after delivering Anna. I was so scared that I thought I would die. So I promised myself not to have another child if I got out of that situation, so here I am." Liu Dongmei said, stating her reasons.

"And I was here thinking you wanted to leave a huge gap between Anna and your next child, or maybe you and Boqin were too busy to attend to another child now. What about Boqin, what was his opinion on this matter?." Liu Huiling inquired further.

"Well, at first he wasn\'t okay with it because he wanted more children. He said we would be lonely when Anna marries out if she is our only child. He needed more children, but I didn\'t need them." Liu Dongmei said.

"So how did he agree with you?."

"Very simple. I told him if he didn\'t love me, and did not want me to live, we could go ahead and have another child. My words disturbed him to put him in a great dilemma for a few days. He remembered what I passed through during labor although he wasn\'t around, but the news of my bleeding and needing a blood transfusion after childbirth got across to him."  Liu Dongmei said.

"I really don\'t know what to say. Well, the case is left for you. But it\'s bad to be scared. Fear is really a bad thing. You can still have another child and nothing will happen to you, but first, you need to change that mindset that you might not survive during your next childbirth."

"How do you think that would work?. Have for forgotten what happened to me back then?." Liu Dongmei asked with an unbelievable expression on her face.

She just couldn\'t believe that everything she just said was for nothing.

She was saying all these to get her Sister\'s support, but that seems to be not happening any time soon.

"I didn\'t lose my memories, they are well intact. I\'m only advising you on the right things to do if you want to have another child but are still scared to. You know, your thoughts control your life a great deal. Whatever you think, so shall you become. So if you keep having negative thoughts about birthing another child, then your fears would really come through. So, you have to be careful of what you think about because your thoughts become the next you." Liu Huiling advised.

"Bravo! You said so many things, and all I got was that I could have another child if I wanted to, and stop with the fears. Well, it\'s not as easy and simple like you make it to look like." Liu Dongmei said as she looked away.

"Of course is not easy and simple as you\'re seeing it from the surface, but it\'s actually simple. How did that thought of Fear start to penetrate you? Of course, you experienced something some other women experience, so now it brought fear into you. Now let me shock you, you\'ve been meditating on that fear for a few years now, so it\'s not going to be easy to shake it off easily, but that does not mean it\'s impossible." Liu Huiling said to her, trying to penetrate her thoughts.

"Ling, are you saying that I was unknowingly harboring fear in my mind?."

"Yeah. The more you are afraid that something would happen, then it will surely happen, because all you think of is FEAR. Now imagine if you were thinking of having no issues with giving birth, and having a relaxed mind, then nothing will go wrong, because you already have a positive thought, and nothing to corrupt it. Look at Lihua for example, she was scared because of the stories she heard about childbirth. But what happened when she decided to come out of those thoughts? She was liberated from FEAR, and she gained her freedom and had a safe delivery".

Liu Dongmei nodded in understanding as she paid rapt attention.

"So you see the lesson here? According to the doctor, Lihua would have gotten seizures, and her blood pressure was already very high. And that might have been because of the Preeclampsia, or maybe because she was afraid something would go wrong. But what happened after, her blood pressure miraculously returned to normal. I just want you to think about all I\'ve said and meditate on them." Liu Huiling said to her.

"I don\'t think there is much to think on it, I understood everything you said." Liu Dongmei said in reply.

"Mei, I\'m serious here. You might have heard and understood everything, but that does not mean you are willing to change from those absurd thoughts. You might even forget everything I said by tomorrow morning, so I want you to think things through, take your time. And if you\'ve decided to have another child, then I will do everything to make sure you are at peace with yourself." Liu Huiling promised.